I'm a designer who turned into a writer who turned into a startup CEO. My mission is to help creators earn a living. Subscribe for essays on building an audience and earning a living as a creator.
Resentment hurts you more than it hurts them
Hey Reader,
Last week I got braces.
A few people I mentioned it to said, “why? Your teeth seem really straight.” And they’re right (mostly).
I had braces when I was a teenager (the full palette expanding, jaw moving, full of metal bars kind) that set my teeth straight. It was painful and time intensive, but totally worth it.
Then after a couple years my retainer broke. I took it in and the orthodontist said it was fine. But it wasn’t. It was broken enough that it would cut the inside of my lip and gums. He insisted it was fine.
I went home angry. I tried the broken retainer again and it just hurt too much.
I put it in a drawer and never wore it again.
The smart move then would be to find a new orthodontist and get a new retainer made. But I was so mad I didn’t do it (also, I was 19 and didn’t have money to spare).
Over the years my teeth moved and I’d gradually notice the results of braces fading away. I just felt more resentment towards the orthodontist.
Then one day I realized: I was only hurting myself.
I’m 31. I already did all the hard work to get straight teeth. It’s dumb to let some crappy medical care from a decade ago continue to affect me.
So last week I got braces. Or rather, Invisalign. It will take four or five months, then my teeth will be back to how they were a decade ago. And I’ll have a new retainer to hold them in place.
The whole thing made me think: what else am I holding on to out of anger, resentment, or fear? I felt like I was somehow getting back at my orthodontist, but he didn’t care. I just hurt myself.
Is there anything you're holding onto that's only hurting you?
---
FROM ART OF NEWSLETTERS
Cherie Hu - The math behind Water & Music, and a successful newsletter
There are two newsletters I follow to understand the music industry: Dan Runcie's Trapital and Cherie Hu's Water & Music. Today I'm thrilled to have Cherie on the podcast to talk about growing Water & Music to 10,000 free subscribers and more than 1,000 paying members.
I loved this episode and I think you will too!
WHAT I'M READING
Why I'm unreachable and maybe you should be to
I'm very reachable. But why? This post made me think: what if I did the opposite?
I have this idea that as a creator I should be accessible to my audience. Answering every email and staying after the show to meet every fan and sign every autograph (I'm not at that level of fame, but you get the idea). But is that actually serving my goals for having the biggest impact and creating my best work?
For now I'm not changing anything, but this post definitely got me thinking!
WHAT I'M READING
Little stories from the Collaborative Fund blog
These are so good! There might have been no United States of America if the wind had been blowing a different direction. A lighting technician came up with one of the funniest lines from Seinfeld. A tiny screw took a plane from stealth to visible. There are so many great nuggets in this collection, I think you'll like it.
Thanks for joining me this week,
P.S. Welcome to all the new subscribers who joined last week! If you're looking for my secret paid newsletter about money, you can buy access here. Email #3 is what got everyone excited as I break down my net worth and all my investments.
Nathan Barry
I'm a designer who turned into a writer who turned into a startup CEO. My mission is to help creators earn a living. Subscribe for essays on building an audience and earning a living as a creator.
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